This is John. We play chess together. Actually, it's more like wage epic battles...there's no play involved. Now I think I'm pretty good but John is way better and the only question is how many moves will I last until the inevitable checkmate. Of course, being the photographer I am, I try to distract him by taking his picture and talking "smack":
There aren't enough Bishops in the world to help you, John."
"Oh, need a big queen to fight your battles, John?"
"I heard your mama liked knights a little too much, John."
I'd go on and on.
Then, the other day, I asked a serious question:
"So John, what if you couldn't ever play chess again?"