Dear President Guðni Th. Jóhannesson
No doubt you have heard about recent events in my country and I am writing to you to see whom I might speak with in your government about a special project that would run approximately four years but result in a huge influx of new export trade for your country as well as an influx of tourism.
As a budding flower photographer, I have long since felt the Icelandic Poppy has not gotten the global attention it deserves when compared to other papavers like the headline-grabbing Papaver somniferum or the showy but incredibly shallow Papaver orientale (which bears a foreboding resemblance to our new leader when he is speaking loudly). My proposal is this: let's create an ongoing campaign celebrating the purity, strength and fortitude of your countries most awesome blossom, (not unlike your people i might add.) I see this campaign driving global export business for this cottage industry (Let's give Holland a little healthy competition) and see if we can't grow a tourist industry to come capture these beauties in addition to all the icebergs, ice flows and icicles. I know many of my friends seem to consider your country a home away from home but they are merely snowbirds compared to what I am suggesting.
Now you may be wondering "Alan, why would this take 4 years?" To that I say we must be thorough! As one who has personally spent great lengths of time translating Stephen King's works into your native Icelandic, I am sure you can appreciate the patience required. Not to mention the fjords to ford and glaciers to galavant over to document these magnificent creatures while talking to farmers, botanists and PR executives about the huge potential I see. What say you, Mr. President?
I look forward to your response
Alan Wright Shapiro
Icelandic Poppy Fanatic